My number five hottie here seems to be missing something in his life. Right, Shia…what the heck is it that you’re missing? Do you lack food? Are you homeless? No friends? Alone in the world? No? Oh…I thought you were missing some basic things of this life, otherwise I cannot explain why you’d break your hand in a car collision, you being at fault.

“Attorneys for Mr. LaBeouf confirm that an automobile accident involving an additional party occurred early morning in Los Angeles on July 27, 2008. Shia is currently recovering from extensive hand surgery with plans to return to work on the set of Transformers 2 within one month. No further comment will be issued at this time.”

Here’s a video of Mr. Transformers’ fucked up car after his DUI yesterday morning:

Oh, I know….car didn’t want to change into a hot robot, right? One more thing….you’re better than that, don’t be a moron! I fuckin’ love you!

Thanks for the tip, G.!